Paranormality

Fearing the plaque or even worse, a possible repeat of the Tuesday night B-team ride at Case, most everyone locked down in their bunkers and inventoried their supply of cry baby soup. Undaunted, TT and Brick decide to ride WHR at 5:30. RickShaw pulls in to an empty parking lot at 5:20 and ponders the meaning of an anti-social ride…"who are we not going to invite?"… in short order Brick and then TT show up. As we gear up a discussion ensues about the legality of night riding as well as the erratic display of Brick’s battery life LED’s; an attempt to contact the alien mothership? Unfortunately the only close encounters on this trip would be between RS and Terry Very Firma. Circling like vultures we wait for Crash Test who is a no show. Start left on the dike, up the hill down the hill (Jack & Jill?) into the wood and over the river (grandma?) right at dirt road Y to left on singletrack. Left onto blue chair trail, RS cleans first climb, gravity claims next two. Brick makes all three. TT grinds his cassette down and eventually makes it to top. Right along fence to log #1, lots of tries some success. Pass water tower to clear cut section pass log#2 to log#3. Brick rides the long one. Log#5, log#8, log#13 stay left, log#21. Back into woods and small rock garden. Log#34 Brick demonstrates the proper way to unclip while going over the bars. RS should have been taking notes. Short road ride along resevoir five, ‘this used to be a nice place to ride before they cut everything down’…hmm…log stunts or forest? Back into woods for short single track section, cross road and over bridge to resevoir five. Down access road with log pile #55 to parking lot. TT and Brick not pleased with the pace leave RS in dust cloud. Straight through to fence along Talcott Notch Road to telephone pole playground. Everyone works the pole and gets off clean. Up sandy single track along fence, right to power lines to paved road. TT suggests going straight (were we going to go gay?) to climb more single track hills. Follow gas line to first left single track to paved road, right to double track cut off with loose sandy climb. Circle around and enter the backside of Kilkenny Rock. Brick and RS clean downhill to road, TT complains of being clumsy. Left on road back down to power lines, up loose rocky to blue trail. Right spur to small double drop. RS takes one for the team, it’s about Time Brick suggests, which is why he rides SheManO. Now if we get stopped we can claim injury. Back into woods to log pile playground, roll 2.3 footer, loose rock down to mini drop, up switch back to power lines. RS over slug rock, Brick? Up to short slick rock section, extra-curricular short steep roll on right on way down. TT has mechanicals, or just an excuse to shine his lights into the sky? Up and over rock to short spur across gravel road back to blew in the woods. Drop 1.87 footer to rock playground. Brick practices hand stand dismount on last roll drop. TT in the lead. Brick and RS circle back to huck 3.14 drop, both ride with style. No takers on Buda’s tombstone. Follow blue to dirt road, left back onto blue single track. RS has brain disconnect as he rides log pile #76 resulting in hip connect with rocky ground. Brick offers some salt for the wound as he cleans the pile exalting ‘look a cable housing’, the only carnage on the trail was RS and his red SPEC.ializED. Slowly onwards. Log#who the fock knows, Brick follows RS line and cleans all five as RS stalls on fourth. TT leads us through new bushawhack trail to avoid clear cut section with log stunts. Reconnect with blue at radio towers to dirt road. TT QM’s on double drop as Brick rolls on through. Regroup at Turkey Trail junction. Opt for turkey. RS leads sleepy pace to clusterfock at log bridge (Lincoln’s log?). TT pushes on and takes left fork as RS says no right spoon. To first rock up, RS reacquainted with Terry. Brick cleans and races on. TT makes on second try. In the distance RS sees lights flashing up through the trees. Brick claims that since we were going so slow he took the opportunity to lie down. RS secretly believes this was another attempt at a close encounters of a different kind. More log piles. Right onto power lines, follow to dirt road to double track going down on the dike, cross the dike and into the bush. Fun tight single track section with roots and rocks. Onto dirt road to pond loop back to dirt road. Up the hill down the hill hammer the dike home.

Rating: three small green anatomically correct humanoids with big heads and glassy black eyes who have gravity intensifying powers which cause you to lose the good fight.

(as a side note: TT’s penchant for riding up hills and his failure to make bodily contact with our mother earth may suggest he is one of them.)

the truth is out there