So many of you email me asking for expanations, definitions and shakes
favorite the acronym - we put together a list to help you out... email
me any additions please.

New

Approach Shoes - Special climbing shoes you where from the parking lot, to the gym, because you have to park so FOCKING FAR AWAY.

chalk monkey - When your girlfriend climbs up next to you and covers your hands with the white stuff

pig penning - when you excessively chalk before climbing, creating a pig pen like cloud over your head and pissing off the prime climb vacuum cleaner..

Old stuff Below
flash - to scare the hell out of a climb before you start it.
gastone - you know - smoke signals - in the parking lot before climbing
slope-her - knock her down and break her toe so she cant keep up to you
hiking
sucky gym - a very small wall in manchester run by stop and shop
baggers.
dyno - to jump instead of succesfully completing a move
turkey's ready - THO - nice teeth - smuggling raisins
Knee thing - you know this one -
resemble - to disagree with, or to look alike
tennis elbow - HJ or climbing injury - you decide
limp rope - any rope gumby hasn't touched
crime - the act of climbing
valet - to park
smearing - to check for disease
stemming - spreading your legs as wide as possible when climbing and
when you have to fart -
PHHHHT - you can tell by the smell
to transport - to lift - to steal
1$ - the most we can afford to bet
$ off meat
$3 whore - See stemming up to pharting
smokey bar - sabaticals
to clean - To make a route using the correct holds, walls and arrets
(when someone is looking)
rug doctor - A company that cleans rugs, just sent them my resume.
rating - how bad was the climb, conversation and drinking
recap - an exact documentation of the nights activities, except
sometimes completly different.
reft - making a left turn yet avoiding the median
right - usually make a reft at a right...
PC - politically correct, prime climb , pissing contest
virgin route - first up the climb
sloppy seconds - after I climb it.
nemesis - a climb that just pisses you off
project - a climb that pisses your belayer off
belay - to not drop
mime - to chalk hands completely white, and pretend you know how to
climb
projects - back room at PC
sky wall - a route you can stem like a $3 whore if your 10 feet tall.
DJJJ - an evil man
KG - Kenny G - are these really routes?
email puke - daily banter after a good bad or ugly recap
cry baby soup - stop whining, or you will be drinking it
flop - to make noise when climbing
swat - grab for a hold like your killing a fly
phone wire - when all else fails on a date
blow up doll or batteries- when you dont have a date
beta - to be the first to flop up
drink - what we do after climbing
drunk - what we are after drinking
dessert - what you get, if your good, and sometimes lucky.
work - what our group does not do very often
climb - what we do after working - its a viscouse cycle
rope bitch - sherpa
belay bitch - injured climber
dependent - non belayer or clingy person.
dangle - to contemplate going up or down while having your genitals
squeezed
donuts - climbing fuel
DOH. - the sound you make when you fall
fall - if your not falling your not climbing hard enough, if your not
climbing or valeting, you are on the couch looking at others falling.
snow - the gym closes when this happens
beaver express - 691, 91, 84 or any other highway that leads one to the
walk of shame the following morning.
WAMHTGT - What a man has to go through for a piece of ass in this modern

day and age is highly ridiculouse.
thespank.com - where seniore P meets strange women - I'm not the only
one!
TWTKACITT - thats what the kids are calling it these days
Bison Balls - You know who has them!
Barn Door - hinging on a hold - openeing yuour body up like a door -
Ask Barbie
Pink Project - Not something you talk about - Gumby's nemesis
Crack - generally do not want to see it - although...
Mr Bond - Now what do you have - Do you expect me to talk - No Mr. Bond
I expect you to die...
Pendulum imitation - see dangle, only with swinging motion added
contraban - the white sticky stuff
floor - what you hit when yrag belays you
floored - the act of hitting the floor
Head jamb - sticking your head in the crack.
Fist jam - sticking your hand in the crack and making a fist.
Foot jam - you guessed it - foot in the crack.
Crack addict - can't keep your extremities out of the crack.

Figure four - completely unnecessary but highly entertaining move to
show off on the sky wall.


different types of holds:
The Brain - an all time favorite
The Cheese - smells better than Jon's feet
Bart - DOH
Breast - molded from CT 's finest
Pancake - see above...
Nubbin - see above...
Globe - see above, but with texture...

Side pull - do this when the normal hold gets boring.
Finger hold - when you can get one finger into the hold
Two finger hold - when you can fit two.
Three finger hold - this hold likes to party.
Hold without any tape on it - off! (see crybaby soup).
Hold that turns when you step on it - you don't really need to use
that one - quit whining.
Undercling - when you forget to wipe thoroughly.
Rope - this is off!
Sloper - see above...



Names

Pam - UG (unemployment girl)- FUG (formerly unemployment girl) - now PP
(princess pam) PEP
(picky eater pam) LUG little umenployment girl.
Allyson - PA (phatass), bandaid girl, MF (magic fingers), MC magic cat,
MS magic sister, mcg
(milk carton girl), ally#1, gg - ginko girl glitter girl gutter girl,
tennis elbow, part of package deal #1 yes a number
Mark - rookie - qt ftg - coma kid (CK) - BeeSting (BS) - columbus - DJ coffee
navigator - fu fu - shake,
shake & bake, boner
mike - j-man - figure 4 mike, ff
chris l - barbie
lisa #11 - SOB sick old bitch COB cranky old bitch
chris d- roller - rope bitch - X
lynn - hb - honey bunny - crazy lynn - ziptie
lynn#3, george OTG , spinner, gumby
craig - crash test
ME - pukemaster - bastard - mystery man - invisible man - PP2 (prince
puke) - lying bastard -
habitual liar - pathalogical liar - pathalogical lying bastard BOMS
(bastard of many sports)
MOMS (man of many sports) boas (bastard of all seasons) x-man, puke boy,
gutter boy, boat
(bastard of all time)
Diana - dirty diana DD, PMD (puke-mistress-di) diana grab-ass, gimptress

Gary - Seniore Pissalot, Seniore P, Focker
Barry Elkind - BTB barry the bastard - gay bastard
chilla - chia pet
Jen - magic butt MB, or magic jungle butt MJB, or BM BLue moon
 
gary #2 - RD Gary (rug Doctor's Gary)
Janice - rug doctor
Yrag, Ga(r - optional)y
Lisa#1 - kneething, OffTheList (OTL), Missing in Action (MIA)
 

Brought to you by noj, kram, yrag