What a turnout! Crash test (craig), bastard (thats me), human basketball (spence),
barbie-now single (chris you
skirt), Magic fingers (ally - formerly PA), Magic Jungle Butt (jen - and it was
a big butt, with crazy african pants),
Figure 4 mike, Rookie (mark or bee-sting or the coma kid), Superman (dan) and
uncle TOM showed up at the main
cliff. All the maybe's showed after a little "encouragement" oh except Charity
on the rocks.
First - crash test and I loaded up and carried the big cooler up to the rock
leaving a pile of stuff behind my car. We
were wondering if anyone was going to carry up that cooler full of rocks without
looking in it?!?!?. Father time stopped
us on the way up to let us know that the cliff was closed at dark, or he will
call the cops - bastard... Finally reached the
rock and crash test almost steps on the largest anaconda snake I have ever seen
- no joke - we have pics of him wrastling
it to the ground and killing it with a chopstick. THe rock is empty wohooo!!
"Quick" setup and we meet spence. First
up mikey - thats me - on YMCA.... Nice climb. Then uncle tom shows up with fried
chicken that he was chased for by
many large black men (MJB must have brought them). Do I need to by MF's for MJB??
This is getting expensive - oh
yeah IM Daddy Warbucks! Crash test goes up YMCA with style - until he hits the
block and struggles, flapping like a
fish. The rest of the clan shows up - even PP. Lots of crack and bush talk after
PP arrives. Figure 4 sets up bushy grove
- thats where I want to be. Craig was spreading the crack, PP and MJB gently
cirlced around the bush, craig lowered
me into the bush fast and superman flew over the bush while at the end of the
night I was in the biggest crack (and it was
a dark crack) I have ever seen. Ok enough crack talk. MF went PP#3, Barbie
skirted up YMCA up to the block, PP
looking for a hard on (e) and is slurring without alchohol. Ally removing pro
with her Magic fingers for HB. Superman
climbed 2ft from the top which is not much better than 50 ft from the car (Nice
climbing). I climbed something to the left
of YMCA that was 5.hard. Anyone else bloody, and burned? F4 mike avoided that
bushy crack(grove) and pulled some
move out of his butt over the roof. Rookie was too busy dealing with nature to
climb and was tired from carrying that
cooler full of rocks - bastard.
Ok enough about cimbing - rookie gets stung by an african killer bee that jen
brought back just for him and he bails
before his throat closes and we have to sacrifice him. Speaking of which - where
are the virgins?? ANyone -
bueller??? OK - rookie and uncle tom leave. Did I mention that poor rookie
carried up that cooler full of rocks for no
reason??? Sorry rook - builds character. At the top sterno's on and I was
cooking up some asphalt chicken while
everyone else gave me a bunch of shit as usuall. Lets see barbie had a small one
- sorry - and then decided to dance
around in MF's MF's - No im not buying you a pair too. MJB - is that a squash or
a tongue in my mouth. I have a double
date with the magic systers on sunday - thats me a large bottle of booze MF &
MJB (hold the squash). MJB wants what
is under MF's butt - there is a word for that ______(Fill in the blank). Citrus
squash and charity rice was served up on a
rock with chopsticks - if you can believe that. All this food smeared on my
pants (as planned) and where is my favorite
girl charlotte to lick it up. Superman is it really space travel or have you
been drinking too much?? Hey where is
spence - must have been abducted by those aliens we saw looking for a basketbal
like head - hope they were gentle with
that anal probe which brings me to track #5 (I want to F@#k you in....) which
dan liked. Music is playing mix #3, #4,
(of cours MF's fav song!!) and then REQUEsted (ally) Sex Rhymes wich scared
everyone off the cliff. Uncle tom took
some pics of PP's pedicure(ooh la la) , MF's butt, PP's butt, and of course a
very special MAGIC JUNGLE BUTT. Trip
down was more challenging than the 5.hard but sex rhymes #1 was playing so who
can complain......... Yes I know..
You will all be begging for a copy. Did anyone see that blonde girl walking home
on 71a - well I picked her up, gave
her a ride to the all night pool hall and now realize that she is 15 and Im
emailing you from jail - told you I would see
the inside of the southington police station before the night was over.
Rating - take that big cooler - full of empty bottles, left over food, bong
water, wet plastic bags and fill it up to the rim
with the finest selection of grey goose and guiness - slimy tongue squash -
asphalt chicken chunky puke on the planet and
carry it for like a mile over rocky terrain spilling it on your shoes and leave
it in a hot car all day. Feel free to have
some with that fine cup of coffee you just spit out.
Cry baby soup girl award goes to - roller - did I even here his lame ass
excuse???
No - show - bryan - chastity on the rocks (busy picking up young boys at the
mall - I assume)
Lisa #1 at least made lunch (where I got the chopsticks)! and by the way your
marshmellows would have been a real hit
Next time - more sterno (seemed to be a real hit), toe nail paint for barbie,
more tongue squash games, and get there on
time so we can actually climb.